Divorce is one of the most stressful events you could experience in a lifetime. This stress starts from the first uncomfortable and potentially devastating conversation when your spouse suggests divorce.

But maintaining your perspective and seeking resources for information and assistance can help you get through the divorce process.

Below are some steps to take after you and/or your spouse decide to get a divorce.

Immediate First Steps

The shock of facing a divorce might rob you of your ability to even think about your first steps. At times like this, you should seek out resources to assist you. Support groups, friends, relatives, and, most importantly, a divorce lawyer, can help you understand what will happen and take steps to face it.

Although it may raise complex family issues, religious questions, and difficult emotions, divorce is fundamentally a legal process. A divorce dissolves a marriage and returns the spouses to the status of single and unmarried.

In the course of a divorce, spouses also may have to resolve issues related to:

As you plan your first steps, it is important to keep these four areas in mind. And if you do not want to face these challenges alone, you should find legal representation to guide you through the process.

Find a Divorce Lawyer

One of your first steps should include consulting a family law attorney. Although this might be your first divorce, an experienced divorce lawyer has dealt with hundreds of divorces and has the experience to know what will happen and how to get the best possible outcome for you and your children.

Behave Yourself

Act rationally. Taking vengeance on your spouse or acting violently will only harm your case in the divorce. Do not slash your spouse’s tires or give your spouse the silent treatment. You could face legal sanctions or even a protective order for misbehaving.

If you do not want to speak to your spouse during the divorce, request that all communications pass through your lawyer or other trusted intermediaries. Refusing to participate in the divorce will not stop it. Instead, hire a lawyer to handle the day-to-day management of the divorce so you can take care of yourself and your children.

Follow Instructions

Your lawyer will give you instructions about what you can and cannot do. For example, they will tell you not to transfer, sell, or hide any assets. They will also tell you not to try to turn your children against your spouse.

Follow these instructions. They will help you avoid sanctions from the court and can position you for the best possible outcome in the divorce proceeding.

Take Care of Yourself and Your Children

The divorce will take time. Until the court finalizes the divorce, you need to take care of yourself and your children. Giving in to depression or anger will deprive you of the focus you will need to gather the documents and records to help your lawyer get a good outcome.  Seek counseling to help you through the process.

To discuss the steps you should take after your spouse asks for a divorce, contact Bleecker Family Law for a consultation.